The Worcester Business Podcast Episode 10 - Dr Lizzy Bernthal

Dr Lizzy Bernthal is an International speaker, executive coach and cultural change specialist delivering online and face to face.

I had a great chat with Lizzy about Covid-19 and how it is affecting our lives and our mindsets. We talked about how her 25 years a nurse in the British army has given her so much, and we get some advice on dealing with our current situtation.

It was a real pleasure to hear about her achievements, and her enthusiasm for helping others.

I hope you enjoy!

You can connect with Dr Lizzy Bernthal on LinkedIn & Facebook, and visit her website for more information too

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lizzybernthal-resilience-specialist/

https://www.rypotential.co.uk/

Call Lizzy for a consultation on 07905 584 218 

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The Reputation Management Podcast & The Worcester Business Podcast are a series of conversations with thought leaders in a wide range of fields. We discuss what reputation means and how everyone can build their personal and business brand. For more information check out https://www.reputationace.co.uk

#reputationManagement #reputationAce #OnlineReputationManagement

Transcript

spk_0:   0:24
my Lizzie. It's Nick. How are you doing? I'm not too bad. Thank you. Yeah, it's a very strange time, obviously. Personally, I'm going through times where seemed to get a complete grip of a feeling. Fine, then obviously, maybe something Some news will come in or you'll hear something on dhe, you know, sort of switch. Is your mind set a little bit And you sort of end up worrying. Obviously, a lot of people in that situation a moment, Which is why I'm really happy to have you on here. So thanks for coming onto the

spk_1:   0:56
pleasure. I think I've been doing lots of conversations. I was last couple of weeks or three weeks, and I did a event, right event yesterday. My first had the courage to do that yesterday, right? Talking about her, then controlled and uncontrollable environment. And I think the one thing I do say just be really careful of how much news you watch because it could complete your record lines that I mean, what was I was just watching it just now. I just turned it off. It was all about it was just gloom. And do you know people? People whose relatives the dying of the concert either way, no, this stuff we don't need to keep reminding ourselves what's going on zone on. I tell everybody, take your phone, take you or whatever it is off your phone. And they elect when you actively decided to watch it so that you decided to watch fix up with the six o'clock news. Because that's when they've had all the cobra be things and so forth, though, that you've got that's what you're going to get the most up to date stuff because otherwise it can just constantly drip feed your mind with negativity, which is not what you need right now. You need absolutely the ox. It's

spk_0:   2:02
Yeah, that's really great advice, actually. Obviously, people are People do have to be mindful about how much social media they do that they use. But in the sort of crisis moments, you do find yourself completely to school locked to it on just waiting for the next day. So, yes, you think just maybe once or twice a day Yeah, yeah,

spk_1:   2:24
yeah. I mean, certainly, I think, what's best void in the morning? I mean, if you want to, you know, I mean it can be if you have in your breath burst in this, then you can have a quick see what headlines are or whatever. But I think certainly not first thing in the morning. The moment you wake up and certainly not the before you go to bed, I'd end of the day that's gonna fill your mind with potentially negativity and, well, I don't know, underestimating and any stretch the seriousness of this when this desisted come up humbly death of covert coming out each day. And I know it's horrendous, But what they're no saying is how many of those people had covert as a secondary issue? No, a primary. She

spk_0:   3:06
Yes. Yeah,

spk_1:   3:08
so we're not guessing true statistics, and I'm not saying as saying, I'm not underestimating the seriousness in any stretch, but they have something If somebody's, you know, had collapsed with counts of poor thing, how they happen to get Kobe because the immunity so compromised that will come as a covert statistic, which is absolutely right. It is a Kobe statistic, but not necessarily hole primary

spk_0:   3:36
beer dying with Cove it rather than off it.

spk_1:   3:40
Yes, exactly. Exactly, exactly. Yeah, So I think there's all sorts of minute. We haven't further conversation afterwards, but certainly all sorts of things to help you when you're feeling those low moments. But, you know, from my quarters like, that's all she'll probably ask me, you know, for my deployed experience, I know what it's like your mindset going up and down all the time. It's like like in a you know, one minute you're the baby s k the next week. The ghosts Okay, of course. But the car bit older. White back in

spk_0:   4:08
the booth. Yes.

spk_1:   4:10
It's learning to ride those waves and realize we are in an extraordinary situation right now on for most people. They've never experienced anything like this before. None of us will experience anybody forever. I suppose I feel quite blessed in the because I've deployed question, Nels. I've learned that sort of hard to manage your mindset, I guess.

spk_0:   4:32
Yeah. I mean, that was what was so fascinating when I read your post and I had a look on your linked in just to give people some perspective here. You're a nurse in the army for 25 years, won't you? Yes. So I guess obviously that's at home and abroad. Yeah. I mean, could you tell Give me a little bit of insight about what that's like. And how about sort of meddling you some fortitude?

spk_1:   4:54
Yes. I left the Army 18 months ago after 25 years in the Army as a nurse and a midwife. And I traveled around the world, deployed all over the world on DDE in most extraordinary circumstances and avalanches and choose and all sorts of stuff. But also, the odd thing is, is I'm so passionate about it. I please a PhD in central school. Well, being on I was seen Electra before my last post in resilience and world leaders and ethical decision making. So I'm really passionate about supporting people and now have a coach and got my business. So I'm absolutely passionate about helping people be the best they can be. But I think what was interesting asked me about my Korea. I think what I didn't realize. I've always be a really passionate about helping people. And now, looking back on all the bits I did in my career, it the theme actually has been giving people a voice because clearly, when people are vulnerable, whether they're sick or whether having a baby, that is when you're very vulnerable. When I deployed, you're often me when have a humanitarian areas we were dealing with sit both injured people that clearly they're extremely vulnerable, I think also, I got involved in trading around those countries in the world in hell effectiveness as well. And I was the global headed massing for the International Committee Military Medicine, which is an organization globally with military minute she medical personnel on dhe. I did some work in certain countries with mercies and giving them a voice, giving them a sense of empowerment. Because of the culture of the rank on dhe, certain started swaying the women and men that we were when divide giving them. Actually, I didn't realize it was giving voice, but that's exactly what I was doing. I also got involved in publication. I got my first when I started publishing, then was really passionate about helping others published their work. So I edited a military journal in order to get enormous nurses publishing in the internationally recognized journal on DSO. I realized then I was giving them a voice and I got a friend got involved in Assisi speaking in the world of those conferences. Still speaking, I love it when you're in the situation on D S O. I got involved in organizing conferences as well and healthy, helping those who never spoken before to conference speak, having the confidence to speak publicly. So looking, and now course on the coach. I'm absolutely passionate to support people, really help them realize that they have everything within them to be completely awesome. So famous, generally being which I didn't even think that was just giving Kriss LA boys and helping them realize that you know everything. I have everything within them. But sometimes it just needs a few questions. And if you just change perspective in order to realize that

spk_0:   7:48
you can't, it's very easy to get into a rut, whether it's for your upbringing or just through maybe a habit that you just continue that you just continue what you're like a happy to check out the the news too much, for example. Yeah, How did you sort of come across this in yourself? Have you always wanted to help people? Or was it something you found when you did something in particular and took it from there was that just over a natural progression, Do you think?

spk_1:   8:13
Yeah, I think it was only my mother wasn't. So I sort of been brought up in that kind of giving to others. And my mother was always giving to people. She was used in the in our village at home. She was sort of the village. Didn't notice the village nurse. Anybody would drink arrack, which they had a top of the size of a broad attack. It that my father I was in the army as well. On Dhe, he had two brothers, kills S O. I was well aware of the sacrifice that sometimes has to be made. And I suppose I was brought up in that environment of you. Give your best on dhe. Sometimes that comes with a certain sacrifice. So I guess I didn't join if I was very late. Comer store in the Army. I didn't join the army. Tonight was 31 which is really quite nice. I've lived a broader works in Hong Kong on dhe run world before that, working at the midwife. But every time I came back to Kate working, innit? Chest? They didn't recognize any of my experience. I had abroad. So it was a great way and nothing. No military. I haven't been brought up a military life. It was a great way to progress in your career on dhe work aboard. So, yeah, So I guess it's it was probably embedded in me even though I didn't meet my parents. Never put me pressure on to be a nurse or doing a thing like that at the time. You know, I'm 58 now. At the time in my school, there was very limited options for careers. I mean, now my daughter got 18 year old daughter who, you know, she might never have a job in tribute. You might just spent her life, you know, having our own businesses. So there were limited options for girls in even even in the eighties and nineties. Really? So yeah, so that's that's how I kind of came into l I never you know, I never intended to stay, and I joined for three years like you doing with your commission in the Army. And then I loved it on just had more and more opportunities, and I was very blessed because they I they funded me from all my higher education, which was incredible on became a pioneer for PhDs because no one has got a p, actually, at that point, and I decided it was time that nicely did get PhDs that work doctors would have been. So should nurses, by the way, if only it could be the 1st 1 Okay, I think even then I suppose I was. I've always wanted to be an advocate for others, you know, Just be a path bit of apart Trinder.

spk_0:   10:45
Yeah, it's amazing. Yeah. I mean, it seems that you've always had this sort of sense of service with your family as well, but obviously, on a personal level. So you've taken that. I mean, you must have seen all kinds of things during your time in the army. Yeah. How is this created your business? How have you?

spk_1:   11:04
Yeah, I think I've always been passionate about personal grace. Um, I think I totally believe you could only grow your business is what she grow your mind sets. So I suppose it just seemed natural to leaks my letters to say my last job was seen Electra and supervising students at the university level page the embassy and the sea level. So I realized that quality, loss of what I was doing, my mentoring apart because I'm so past for helping them. It's a portion, and that was quite a coaching going on. But I didn't realize I was really coaching, but I clearly awas so it just became a natural progression for Mi Teoh train to qualifies as a coach. Andi, I just wanted to expose because I spent so long in the High Rock organization. I just wanted to sort of prove that I could do something for myself without that that hierarchical organization, really? So it just seeing natural that I just wanted to work for myself on Dhe just set up my business?

spk_0:   12:08
That's great. So how is that generally looking for? Is that helping the individual or businesses? Or is it both?

spk_1:   12:16
But yeah, so honestly, before covered when it was all face to face, go go to businesses to help them with their cultural change with their individual individuals. The court s So I run stress manager well being watched shots but also passionate about helping people identify their purpose of their values. So helping organization developed the mission statements on DDE. Their vision state was actually means something. I'm actually matter of an embedded in every person, the organization, because my mission is to help. Most organ or close relations are getting so much better This But my mission is that you have to work from the Y out. How on the walked will work will work itself out if you've got the wire. Right. And where is a lot of organizations? What? The other way around?

spk_0:   13:04
All right, How are we going to get

spk_1:   13:06
you? Yes. So if you if you look after your star, help them to be the best they will be You don't have to worry about your productivity because they will naturally be passionate about doing what? What's right for them. So So that's my mission is to help its support organizations in that space. But actually everything stops with each individual. So I do it mixture due to what individuals within the organization and I also worked with individuals, but nothing to do with the business. I just like 121 on also deliver workshops with groups of people that might be nothing to do with business. But there's just certain groups to people who just want to understand a bit more house to it, improve their stress management or their resilience, feel better or find their purpose or a ll sorts of different issues. Have Thio Kim the cage better help people public speaking as well. Give them a voice in that. So all sorts of some self development leadership, your hope, lecturer, preference of issues. That's but you know that people need.

spk_0:   14:10
So whenever you're trying to make a change, I think I gather from what you're saying that it's really about self exploration on dhe, learning and growing. Do you have any any advice or tips for people trying to navigate this situation at the moment?

spk_1:   14:24
Yes, absolutely. I think the most important thing is to develop a routine. That's the first thing I think you know. No one in the third week of locked Down, I'm sure. Hopefully most people have developed some sort of rooty. I think we're in extraordinary, unprecedented circumstances with so many factors, from fear of getting really sick to suddenly families being put together. Christmas is often the challenge and now we've got it. We know how long. So the challenge under blessings. I mean, it's both ways of being suddenly enforced with people, our families, which can't be a great gift or it can be a challenge, and it's working house to never get that. But it's helping in setting, setting the routine setting boundaries and particularly, if suddenly find only you work you. No, but you've got I'm schooling to do and navigating, even if it's just the WiFi, because the wife I'm just not give to have everybody Oh,

spk_0:   15:22
a lot of people, Yeah,

spk_1:   15:25
yeah, things getting getting a strict routine Then So, for example, you get stuck. It's a normal time you get dressed, and if you're working from home, get dressed in clothes that you go to work in. I'm not saying you have to wear a three piece suit, but just separating. It's working out how to do your boundaries. Now, if you've got a work, you need to have a designated workspace. Even if you've got if you've got so much separate, that amazing because you can physically shut the door. But if you haven't, it's working at those boundaries and literally, maybe it's closing. Your laptop means that's your boundary, that the office is no shut. It is healthy, helping develop those boundaries and negotiating with the rest. Your family. Who's doing what and having a big calendar where everybody. I mean, if you're by yourself, it's it's, you know, mostly very difference, but it's having that set routine of working up from the very basics outwards. First thing you put in your calendar of the North negotiables when you having breakfast, when you having lunch, When you having supper? What you doing your exercise? Those things that are so important because now, well back to our basic basic needs. And if you've heard of Maslow's hierarchy of needs we have, there's various that we have to go up to. The top one is self actualization, where you're absolutely the best you can possibly be. You're living your dream, but that's because your best version of yourself and most of us were way up there. You know, we weren't We were really working to you again. Emotion or, you know, having Children, whatever that life was carrying doing for us, suddenly coded, arise way back to the bottom. You know, it's absolutely survival of food, air, water, safety on doing scarcity. That is why we have this ridiculous, awful behavior move Ward. Yeah, but by tens of buddy Beefeater even normally eat, you know, rolls all this stuff. And it's because those individuals had such fear from that sense of scarcity. That's where the book Blind Kicks is.

spk_0:   17:33
Yeah, How does the fear as you see this move, do you think that some of the fear has subsided? Or does it just change into something else? As in it seems, it seems like the initial panic buying has happened. People seemed to have calmed down a little bit in the supermarket, for example. But now the current situation is how long is the lock down gonna be, which I think is all pretty much made up by the media because I think the lock down is gonna be for a long time. I think it's pretty self obvious. I think it's obvious, I think, I don't know, maybe maybe people have to be told that slowly for population toe Unter agree with it. But I mean, I think in my mind a couple of months I would imagine maybe some limitations, but yes, so are we in a different fate is now. Do you think or do you just sort of go back and forth and sort of have to deal with that when you're through through, as you say, like a schedule and kind of discipline?

spk_1:   18:28
Yeah, I think it's Yeah, I think it's interesting. Epic, I think. Everybody people in different phases. I think there was a certain acceptance. Now most people thank goodness that this is world, innit? For not so the long haul. But for the foreseeable hall on, I think that things that things take world to settle down, I think it takes time and the first week ever. Blues in complete, utter shock. Yeah, the second week it was, you know, how come? How could we do this? Walking into, you know, get into a routine on now? This week, there's becoming a bit more than acceptance. Oh, my goodness, we might be in this for a while. So what? How we can make how we can make the best of it. So I think it's it's gaining that sense of control, and on the other thing off it's really vital is that we focus on the things we can control

spk_0:   19:17
and

spk_1:   19:17
let go of the things we can't. We have no control how long this is gonna be going on for. But we can Control is how we're dealing with day today, Okay? And this is what's interesting on deployment, because when you want deployment, you're literally working for minutes or hours. And I was like, days, because you have no idea what's gonna happen and then the next literally, Martin, it's 10 minutes, not the next hour looking next two hours. Whatever. So you learn the skill of just letting go of what the future is to certain extent you can plan for the future because you can waste so much emotional energy. Well, how long is this gonna be in for? We could meet for months to wait three months. For what? You know. You know, you could waste so much emotion, Angel. That's so bring it back. Let go, if you can. Of that stuff you have no control over and focus on the here and now what you're having for your brat first, What you gonna achieve today? What? And I think it's vital that people have a goal for each day now it might be a goal like I'm going to go running around the block. And I don't normally or I'm gonna walk around the block because obviously they got for excise went today. And I would encourage everybody to absolutely capitalize on that right now because it's really important to get into the fresh air. And now we've got lovely weather, hopefully to get into the fresh air because that is really good. Feel bones, obviously by, you know, the social distancing. And I think I went for a run this morning and I think everybody are certainly where I live. Everybody's been really considered. I'm a no source. Only saw three people on my run anyway. But even those three people, all of us were I just crossed the road to give them a birth. And if they have, they saw the first and they crossed the road before me so that you way were really considered about social distancing. Ah, nothing biggest I would give Everybody is well, you're feeling in those low moments where you're feeling anxious, have a think about what you could do for someone else. Because assert is you start thinking of others that takes you away from yourself. We're also developing that sense of gratitude that will be my biggest biggest tip is having gratitude because when you're in gratitude, you cannot feel fear and anxiety. So it's learning those little things each day that before we would feel completely taken for granted. So having a warm shower with some life shower gel having a delicious cup of coffee what whatever it is that before we would just take for granted, start noticing those little things that

spk_0:   21:59
if you

spk_1:   22:00
make all day better,

spk_0:   22:02
yes, definitely, I am 100% agree with that. And I think it's definitely worth reiterating because I, maybe about maybe 10 years ago wasn't really particularly happy in my job. I started sort of. I started taking responsibility for things rather than blaming other people. And then there was, ah, in what I was listening to At the time, there's a lot of people talking about gratitude. I started being trying to be a bit more caring to others and a bit more aware of how they might perceive something I did or something like that. I did notice that I just Germany felt better. Even if it was initially it was. I did it so that I would feel better, eh? So it was almost like a selfish gain to begin with. But seeing the result, actually, it takes you out of yourself is you say, focus on something else on. Do do something positive. You feel positive. So it's like a cycle.

spk_1:   23:00
Yeah, it's interesting. You say that. I mean, I think it was One thing I would like to comment is the fact that all of us, we're always, uh, blaming, justifying or growing. I mean it. We're always in. We'll always have one of those three states. Why the blaming? Whether it's government or cells wherever justify. Oh, I can't go wrong today because I'm not really mates go out the house, for example. Yeah, I'm always growing. I know this is like when you're in gratitude, you're growing hands. I always that my day off every day because what time I get at what time I go to bed? I always write five things. I'm great before, Before I go to sleep, I won't wake up in the morning and let's just noted, and it gets you into that mindset just noticing. Like, now I can hear the birds sing in this gorgeous so I think that's partly because there's no claims. Go down for it. It's only the birth. Could be house. Yeah, it's thinking about how we could be grateful for what we're in right now, and I know that sounds really bizarre. And it's It's the most horrendous situation for many, many people. And I lost my basis overnight, you know, Now I'm but I'm taking the bulge thinking, Wow, that's just about the moment and see moving on life. So So all of us are having some sort of adversity to some extent, it how you can. It's changing that mindset from feeling of victim. Oh, why me? Why is it happen now? Two. Okay, what can I learn from this? You and changing that into learning opportunity? See, um, Wild man feeling negative? I'm resentful. And that's why gratitude comes in really well. You cannot feel resentful on angry and anxious. If you're really grateful that you just called. It is impossible, but it also boosts your energy levels to make you feel better. So that gives him more incentive to do something positive.

spk_0:   25:04
Okay, so it's basically taking the taking, taking the tips, and then how do you. Do you ever have problems with anybody you're working with where they don't where they sort of They understand they agree with you, but they don't have. They sort of have a problem following through and maintaining it. Is there any Germany tips to maintain? Because the

spk_1:   25:21
way Colonel So yeah, wait, don't say what I think the interesting. I just called about Crestor Nation. Procrastination is a protective mechanism. There's no slow body that is a procrastinator. It's a habit that you could get into on what procrastination is is basically our brain protecting us from doing something we don't want to do because our brain is there to protect us. And unfortunately, it's still prehistoric from the Tigers and the lines that were chasing us. We were running for our lives and killing animals to feed and so forth. Unfortunately, the brain had to say the impact on us. But now, of course, it's not the line that tigers. It's a moment, it's Kobe. It it's It's like losing financial imp, whatever. Whatever it is, it's happening to us right now. And so, so procrastination is its noticing it, and so it's stopping us, doing the things we're gonna do. For example, if you don't want it reattached your turn because it's horrible job. So you put it off the golden tomorrow. I'll do it tomorrow because the fear we're doing it is worse than actually just leaving it till tomorrow. There's couple e jaggery arrives when you think all the gold. Oh, my goodness. Uh, I might get a little from the tax punch. The fear of a letter from the taxman someday galvanizes us to get attached headed just because the fear of the tax was great in that actually doing it

spk_0:   26:49
right? Yeah.

spk_1:   26:51
So And I would also say that this is from my experience. And I'm sure most people's experience the fear of doing something is often way worse than actually doing it. Yeah, so often you what you affair of doing it Something actually, doing it. It feels great, actually, is the best, um, solution Thio here something. But what I also say it this is this is a really great tips for success, which all successful people do do the thing you're dreading most as soon as you can do it. So if there's something in your day that you know you have to do, do it first, get out the way because you get that great sense of achievement and you've done it. Then how often do we just keep putting it off? Putting it off? But he did not on. That's why things like exercise, in my opinion, is great. Start first thing in the morning because you've done it. You feel great. You feel energized on before you achieve something before the day begins. Its so easy, although later I'll go later. I'll go later, then to child Services for the telly. Look, I get it out, get worried

spk_0:   28:02
and it's hanging over your Isn't it the sort of the that the guilt of not doing it and the fear of doing it? Um,

spk_1:   28:08
yeah, that destroys your mindset. It just makes you feel rubbish about yourself.

spk_0:   28:13
Yeah, that does. I mean, they're they're great tips. I think of being being spending all the time in the garden, and I've sort of I'm trying to do a little bit with the garden every day, so I can see that over the next few months. Hopefully, we'll get a much better position. When I read your first post, the reason actually contacted you is when you were You wrote post a couple of days ago, talking about savers, which is a silence information visualizations, exercise, reading in describing. I sort of do a few of them every now and then, but it's nice to have it. I always love little quotes on dhe. A few different words that mean something Maur you know, like a like a towel. So I love that. And that's why I wanted Thio wanted to have a chat with you because you and I mean specifically affirmations. Hey, say, 10 times I am enough. But your brain can't argue with that. I start to do that, and then I sort of feel I feel I didn't like. That's a very interesting one for me because it's hard to feel like you're enough. It's hard to even for me to really know what that actually means, because I feel like I'm enough in terms of, you know, being a dad, being a partner, enough of my business. But then there will definitely be something in me which will feel like I'm not enough as well. So I guess the affirmations. I guess it's in the same thing as being in the moment. You just sort of tell yourself when you believe it and it's it sort of pushes everything else away, does it?

spk_1:   29:47
Yeah, I think the reason Nice, unready past about it you must cover. I think the affirmations are amazing. However, to do affirmations correctly, you've got to do something that you're brave, doesn't argue it. So I totally get that. You know, I'm enough, but I don't think I don't really feel Armin up. But I think wreck addition is the one thing. And I think generally I would say the majority of people thoroughly everybody a coach. But the majority of people do not feel there enough, and it's good enough last enough for slim enough or whatever it is. There's something about them they don't feel enough on. So the thing about say I'm enough is that number one. It reminds us that we absolutely are enough. In fact, well, amazing. But sometimes you don't realize we're amazing. Brain called all you with it. So I called them cover mantras, roubles on informations, I think because I think affirmations sometimes sometimes affirmations. You have to say you have to have something about the future How you want to be But not something that something you've got already so like I am told I'm courageous, I'm brave We are all called bold, courageous and brave We might not be to the extent we wish we were But we all have that within us Keep you say if I say I'm a multimillionaire drive my Ferrari with a multi £1,000,000 business and then your brain says no You know you've got caps out cause so you haven't got any money in your bank a cow And they ate outset I'm sorry. And also, after all, So that so. That's why there's sometimes affirmations. We need affirmation to help us. And in Paris,

spk_0:   31:39
you

spk_1:   31:39
help us realize you actually have enough. Yeah, enough. So I literally have it on my mirror. I literally have it would let the old barbera in my bathroom. So I've got my daughter's one and I've got around the house. Yeah, we see it well around the house. We see it because that yes, Okay, I am. And I have it on alerts on my phone. That's what I tell everybody. You know, he could even have it as your password for your laptop. Always see. No, I'm enough. Is that so easily to have? But you know, you, you Theo's isn't a zero or, you know, you just sort of make let squiggles on whatever it is within it. So it's like it's secure. But I think the more the more you say that to yourself, you know, when you're in the shower and you're kind of those moments of sort of nothingness when you're just like I worry, honestly, it can't be transformational when they see people that got absolutely everything and then they kill themselves, they can fly so tragic. You know, George Michael Away, these extraordinary people, clearly they're fundamentally feel that fundamentally flawed because they don't father enough generally from something that's happened in your childhood. We have not felt good enough on dhe, so it's just it's just a very simple thing. Very simple. She could have pages and pages and pages of information which mean anything. So if you just had a one information, I would suggest it. I, um you know, and shout out. That sounds bizarre. Literally. Shout out. Well, you're in the call shots out when you look at

spk_0:   33:21
you. I think I'm gonna hold onto. I'm enough. And I'm going to try because you're not going to ever feel like you are enough. If you don't say you're not feel like you're enough. So it's definitely a positive step. And I think what, just as you were saying that are sort of repeating in my mind. And you're right, you do. You do instantly feel less self doubt on dhe This the negative thoughts that you can allow to creep over because I think when you're depressed, it feels like the negative side of life is more true and rial. You know, death, darkness, despair. They feel like more real to you at the time. So I guess it's a bit. It's guess. It's a sense of taking it back to something positive and making that feel, really, because that's obviously the best way for you to actually process things anyway. You might as well be, um, in a more positive state.

spk_1:   34:13
Yeah, it's repetition, repetition, repetition. And actually, they've done all sorts of our eye scans or brains, and they can tell us scientists can actually tell if you're happy personal, not because simply it simply because of the brain waves going through your brain. So the more you can say it, the better. You know, I've been there, you know, I had moments of when I was depressed and so forth, and I didn't know about this stuff. You know, My God, if I had known about this stuff, then I could feel a bit of a bit of ease. The pressure? No. One look so quickly, and I think it's just tragic when you see see individuals really suffering when there's something quite simple. I'm not saying it's easy. There's often simple things are not always easy when you're not feeling great about yourself. It just doesn't feel right to say I'm enough. But it's a simple thing. That and it is. As you say, it's repetition because the first time you sound enough. Oh, no. Enough Victorian. Come on, you're that self doubt. Comes and literally on the 10th time. Said it yourself. Yeah, I can't. Okay, I have a great day.

spk_0:   35:20
Yeah, let's do this. No, it's brilliant. I think it's that was, um yeah, that's a great That's a really great tip of Elvis Eve. You've said lots of really really in interesting, really interesting things. But I'll definitely take that away for sure. And I definitely give that a go.

spk_1:   35:38
Yeah, let me know how that all, because I think it's obviously a sex tape. Wild. Don't expect it to happen instantaneously, because often we've got years and years and years and years of embedded is sort of not negativity within us. But you know, when people put us down and we've believed that they were not good enough and that something but also why would say, is that if anybody puts us down, that's that stuff you know, alls. And that's the other radio

spk_0:   36:07
reflection of them. It

spk_1:   36:08
is. Be aware of works, other people's stuff and watch your stuff. So if anybody puts you down, generally they're reflecting on something they don't like about themselves. And sometimes, unfortunately, individuals aim to get better about themselves by putting other people down.

spk_0:   36:27
Yeah, it's very common. Yeah,

spk_1:   36:29
yeah, yeah. So notices on dhe unsee. You know, I think, and the other way to get your affirmations is anything you don't like about yourself. Write it down on then or anything you actually anything you don't like about somebody else write that down if you don't send, activate. You don't like about someone else? Because generally that reflex something you don't like about yourself, and then you put in front of it. I am. So if you if you if you look at somebody who was aspired to be and you think, why do I spot? Because they're so confident. That's Joni, cause you don't feel confident to then an affirmation could be I am confident.

spk_0:   37:10
Yeah, okay. Yeah, that's good. I like that. So it's just rewiring it. I guess by doing that, you really get to get to have a look at yourself as well, because a CZ you said earlier I mean, what with stages there was one was blaming others. One was just before

spk_1:   37:24
I was blading justifying. Yeah, but this is not a good look at yourself. I don't want to look at myself today. I don't feel I'm you know, But the more you more that you learn Thio to accept yourself better life can be. And, you know, as I can only say from experience, you know, I've been really dark moments where, so I'm not just just doing this room off is a great idea. I'm gonna totally I'm doing with passion because I have bean in those dark places. Um, I it's it's work for me and Oh, yeah, you this stuff before I just want people to know this stuff so that actually can short circuit any pain that they're in.

spk_0:   38:06
You know, it's great. It really it's such a valuable thing to hear hope our listeners go lock from it, too, because yeah, really, really valuable inside and a very real word. Real world use as well. So

spk_1:   38:23
yeah, yeah, particularly at the moment. We need it more than ever. Yes, so do what it takes, and this is where this is. This is also a great opportunity for those that I've got more time on their hands. I mean, I seem to be busier than ever, which is great. I mean, I'm just doing so much for free right now because I just want to help help as many people as I can. But if you have, if you have got more time on your hands because you being furloughed or whatever this is a great opportunity will never get this opportunity again, either. Whether it's clearly the cluster of your house or taking up a colleague who's just suicide to love the piano. She's always wanted to learn the piano. It did. Jake saw anything, but but actually the all my goodness you get that get a sewing machine to stop making. So whatever did it, whatever it is. Yes, it is an amazing opportunity to Creativity is so important. That's probably why you love your garden.

spk_0:   39:25
You

spk_1:   39:25
know, I used to think I'm their times crazy. You got a job, you know, so much ego going on. It's so true. I'll see people would have it whatever. Now Oh my God, actually really realize it. But what gives you joy? Nothin. If gardening gives you joy. Amazing, because that gives you that sense of achievement. Actually, that is because it's boosting your creativity, even if its clock planting a plant pot or whatever it is we're mowing the Lord or whatever it is. Yeah, that is creating. Let's build supposed to your creativity. And we're all absolutely needs and creativity in our lives, which is why people enjoy cooking. And that's why people are doing lots of baking right now, because again that's create, you're creating something that's lovely to eat.

spk_0:   40:13
Yes. Yeah, on Dhe. You're right. I think I of always musical goals on dive. Always. Especially since I started my business. I just had no time to play the guitar or, you know, play the keyboard. But I think I'm gonna bring the keyboard downstairs. Yeah, I do know that I absolutely love music. But again, that that was something where self doubt stopped me doing it. I felt sort of I'd write something. Thank you. I really feel that. And then I feel really, really read it again. I'd feel really cringe e about it. But I've got anyone distant. I would think it was terrible on those mind sets. A terrible. So, as you say, live in the moment and you tell yourself you are enough and do something creative. I shall. I do half of it. So I'm trying to get, you know.

spk_1:   40:58
Yeah, way need to go back to being a little Children again. And I think you know, Children when they're three and four, they don't have that south doubt. You see them on that. The other thing You know, Children are emotions are exactly the same with the way the anxious or excited little Children when they're doing their Christmas plays or whatever. They're just so excited. They've got the same feelings of, like, ugly Tommy's and on like that adrenaline. But they're just interpreting its excitement because they don't have that fear of not being good enough. Or, you know, someone's gonna think that's do kids or anything like that. Unfortunately, I don't know when we get to five or whatever it is when we get to school, all that South Doubt kicks in or not Good love or no, I guess not. Best give it go because I'm not fail a ll this stuff. Children just don't just destroy all their radar. Yeah, yeah, Babies are full of confidence that thin it lying there, cop thinking. Well, don't look at me. I've got really fat legs. I've got a

spk_0:   41:57
really bad day. You

spk_1:   41:59
know what? They in eight, we feel they matter. You know, If they want something, they cry. And if they don't want it now, smile. You know, they just never Carter, though. Oh, Joe, this is a bad day. I best not ask for this or no, they want trouble. Anybody today you're as something kicks in because it's that survival they before they have that risk of confidence or anything, they're just babies, babies. And, baby, if you want your baby, it's fascinating because they split second by second from emotions. Well, when you were crying the next minute a laughing that's witness smiling, You know, they just literally flipped. Yeah, I have low with my moments because they're absolutely in the moat

spk_0:   42:43
is in line. Yeah. No, I mean, it's a brilliant, brilliant take away. Thank you so much for speaking to me today.

spk_1:   42:52
Although it's a pleasure and the joy and thank you so much. They're coming. I just I just love you know, it's being real honor and pleasure to speak. I just want to share. So they keep giving me this opportunity problems. Some tits?

spk_0:   43:05
Yeah, definitely. How can people get hold of you? I'll send this to you later on, and I'll put links in the description. Obviously, there's Dr Lizzie Burn Throw on linked in. Yes. Yeah. And your was your website, is it? Yeah,

spk_1:   43:20
but I'm in the process of changing. My website is still there, but it's not great right now, but it's our Why Potential? Yeah, my email is Lizzie Allies that why our why? Potential dot co dot UK, which is my business. Release your potential. And then my mobile is 07905584 She won eight. Then I'm on Facebook as well. So dizzy burns full on Facebook. All linked him, then Those in my contact details. That's

spk_0:   43:54
great. Our link. One of these in the description. But I mean, once again, thank you so much today it's being really enlightening. Pleasure,

spk_1:   44:01
pleasure. And they're here to support anybody. I'm just so passionate of helping people realize they've got absolutely everything inside them to be totally awesome and live their best life. Really mean that look like, Oh, that sounds also by the sky. I

spk_0:   44:18
know. I can really tell. Obviously from definitely.

spk_1:   44:21
Yeah, great. Have

spk_0:   44:24
a great Dane. Is he'll speak using Thank you by now.